What are Parasocial Relationships - and How Can They Impact Your Mental Health?
Have you ever found yourself talking back to a podcast or wishing you could give your favourite tv character a hug?
Parasocial relationships are often seen as weird, obsessive feelings toward celebrities and public figures - but they’re actually a lot more common than you might think.
Here at KMA Therapy, we’re here to help you understand the latest psychology buzzwords and understand how they apply to your daily life.
After reading this article, you’ll know what parasocial relationships are, the different types of parasocial relationships, and the impacts they can have on your mental health (both positive and negative.)
What are Parasocial Relationships?
A parasocial relationship is a one-sided emotional or social connection that you build with someone you don’t know.
This might be a celebrity, a public figure, or even a fictional character in a movie or book.
What is the Psychology of Parasocial Relationships?
Parasocial relationships happen in three phases.
The first phase in a parasocial relationship is when you’re introduced to the person or character - you see them in a new tv show or you hear their music for the first time. If they pique your interest, you move on to phase two.
During the second phase of parasocial relationships, you become repeatedly exposed to this figure. They might become your favourite character on the show, or they might become your latest instagram follow.
The final phase of parasocial relationships happens when you have a solid desire to keep interacting with this person or character. You’ll rewatch the scenes they’re in or scroll through their social media, wanting to learn more and deepen your connection.
Psychological reasons for parasocial relationships include:
- Social attraction
- A sense of companionship
- Building a sense of identity
- Little to no chance of rejection
- A sense of community (including with other people who like the same public figure)
What are the Different Types of Parasocial Relationships?
There are three types of parasocial relationships, as identified by researchers Giles and Maltby in 2006.
1. Entertainment-social relationships
The most common type of parasocial relationship, entertainment-social relationships form when a celebrity or fictional character becomes a source of entertainment in your daily life.
You like to stay up-to-date with what they’re doing, enjoy the music and media they’re part of, and it’s fun for you to discuss their lives with your friends.
These types of parasocial relationships can become a source of connection in your real-life friendships and help you feel a sense of community with other people who are fans of the same figure.
2. Intense-personal relationships
Intense-personal relationships can leave you feeling a stronger sense of connection to the celebrity or character. These types of relationships can be incredibly intense, and you often feel deeply connected to the figure in question.
If you’ve ever had a deep celebrity crush who you were sure would fall in love with you if you just met them in real life, that’s an example of an intense-personal relationship.
Intense-personal parasocial relationships might sound scary, but they’re not necessarily a bad thing. In this type of relationship, you can have strong feelings toward a public figure while realizing you don’t actually have a relationship with them.
As long as you’re able to understand this distinction (and don’t try to replace your real-life relationships with a fantasy of a public figure), there’s nothing wrong with this type of parasocial relationship.
3. Borderline-pathological relationships
The third type of parasocial relationship happens when things get out of control. You’re no longer able to separate fantasy from reality and you’re convinced that the celebrity cares as much about you as you do about them.
These types of relationships are not as common, but can be harmful to your mental health. They include uncontrollable fantasies and behaviours toward the celebrity or public figure, to a point where they interfere with your daily life and your sense of reality.
If your parasocial relationships are beginning to interfere with your enjoyment of your real-life relationships and your daily life, it can be helpful to speak to a mental health professional about how to end a parasocial relationship.
Are Parasocial Relationships New?
Parasocial relationships may seem more prominent than ever, especially since social media offers such a personal look into lives of public figures and celebrities, but they’re not a new concept.
The term “parasocial relationship” was first coined in the 1950’s by researchers Donald Horton and R. Richard Wohl. With television growing in popularity, Horton and Wohl realized that people were relating to the actors on-screen in a way that almost felt like real conversations.
While parasocial relationships may seem like yet another current trend, they’re much more normal than you might think.
Parasocial Relationships and the Pandemic
That’s not to say that parasocial relationships haven’t evolved over the years.
If you found yourself feeling more attached to tv characters and celebrities during the COVID-19 pandemic, you’re definitely not alone.
Social distancing may not have altered how emotionally close you were with your friends, but the changes in physical closeness left room for parasocial relationships to become even more important.
Perceived closeness in parasocial relationships was found to increase as social distancing went on - as people spent more time seeing their loved ones over screens, the attachments they felt toward celebrities and characters on their screens became stronger too.
Are Parasocial Relationships Bad?
No, there’s nothing inherently wrong or bad about parasocial relationships. As long as you can recognize that your relationship is one-sided, there’s nothing to be concerned about.
Problems arise when you start to forget that the other person doesn’t know who you are or you believe that your parasocial relationships are more important than your real life relationships.
While parasocial relationships can offer a sense of safety because there’s no real risk or rejection or need for intimacy, that’s also why they can’t be as fulfilling as your real-life relationships - shared vulnerability and intimacy are important parts of human connection, and can’t be replaced with parasocial bonds.
That being said, as long as your parasocial relationships remain grounded in reality and aren’t used to replace all other types of relationships, they can be healthy and beneficial for your mental health.
Benefits of parasocial relationships include:
- Growing your sense of self-esteem
- A sense of community and connection
- Exploring new aspects of your identity in a safe environment
Parasocial Relationships and Mental Health
Ultimately, parasocial relationships can be good for your mental health when you acknowledge that they are one-sided relationships and you don’t use them as a replacement for in-person connection.
If you feel like your parasocial relationships provide a source of entertainment and comfort, they can be a healthy way to engage with your favourite celebrities and fictional characters.
If your parasocial relationships are starting to interfere with your ability to enjoy relationships in real-life, it can be helpful to explore these feelings with a mental health professional.
Here at KMA Therapy, we’re relationship experts. No matter what type of relationship you want to explore, we’re here to help you understand your thoughts, actions, and behaviours.
Register Online to connect with our team or take our free Attachment Styles Quiz to learn more about the relationships in your life.
If you’d prefer to keep reading, explore these related articles:
- 5 Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem
- 5 Ways to Develop a Secure Attachment Style
- What is Limerence? (& 5 Ways to Recognize It)
About the Author
Emily Weatherhead has a Masters in Community Psychology from Wilfrid Laurier University, where her research focused on improving post-secondary student mental health. She is passionate about finding new ways to make mental health research more accessible and break down the barriers that prevent people from receiving mental health care.
