Porn Addiction: What it is, How it can affect you, and How to recover
Porn is extremely accessible, private, and mostly free. As a result, people are watching more pornography from a younger age.
Some studies have found that a significant number of children are exposed to porn by the age of 10. Many of them continue to intake porn throughout their adolescent years and onwards.
The effects of pornography at a stage in one’s life when their brain and sexuality are developing has serious consequences, and porn addiction is often one of them.
Although the term “porn addiction” has become popular in the past few years, it is still a difficult topic to address for most, often bringing up feelings of shame. Porn and masturbation are subjects that are still taboo. Many people who deal with related issues tend to do so anonymously and alone.
Porn addiction, often tied with compulsive masturbation, affects your sense of self and your relationships. It can even affect how you view the world.
Throughout my time as an intake specialist, I have seen countless clients come in for porn addiction and compulsive masturbation.
I want to assure you that these are extremely common issues. You are not alone, and it is not hopeless.
In this article, you will learn the answers to the following questions:
- What is porn addiction?
- How can porn addiction affect me?
- How can I recover from porn addiction?
By the end, you will have a better idea of whether you struggle with porn addiction. You will also know what steps to take to overcome porn addiction.
What is porn addiction?
While many people associate addiction with the use of drugs and alcohol, the term can also refer to behavioural patterns.
For example, the World Health Organization recognizes compulsive gambling and video gaming as behavioural addictions.
Although porn addiction is not currently a recognized medical condition, a study by the University of Cambridge has found that compulsive use of porn causes the same brain changes as those seen in cocaine addicts and alcoholics.
Recent research has found that 3%-6% of the adult population may be affected by porn addiction.
Many people watch porn. You may wonder: What's the difference between a healthy relationship with porn and porn addiction?
Like other addictions, people who watch porn compulsively may become consumed with related thoughts and behaviours.
An unhealthy relationship with porn will affect your daily functioning and your relationships. It may also cause emotional distress and physical changes.
Some signs that you may be struggling with a porn addiction include:
- Constant thoughts of porn
- A constant need to watch porn
- Lowered satisfaction with your sex life
- Spending large sums of money on porn
- A compulsion to watch porn in risky places
- An inability to achieve sexual satisfaction without porn
- Unsuccessful attempts to stop or reduce porn consumption
- A need to watch more and more extreme, often violent, porn
- Strong feelings of shame or guilt about the amount or type of porn you view
- Watching porn at the expense of other responsibilities (work, school, household chores)
- Withdrawal (frustration, agitation, depression, insomnia) when you try to stop using porn
How can porn addiction affect me?
Like with all addictions, porn addiction can feel all-consuming. It may feel like you can’t gain back control of your life. The shame and guilt many people with porn addiction feel may also isolate you from those closest to you.
Porn addiction can affect:
- Your relationships
- Your thoughts and emotions
- Your ability to live your life
1. Your relationships
If you are dealing with porn addiction, your relationship with your partner may be drastically affected.
Those struggling with porn addiction may hide how much porn they watch, or the kind of porn they’re watching. If your partner has asked you to stop or reduce the amount of porn you watch, the shame associated with porn use may increase.
Porn addiction is also associated with:
- Loss of libido
- Erectile dysfunction
- Dissatisfaction with sex life
Those struggling with porn addiction may only be able to achieve sexual satisfaction through ‘extreme’, often violent fantasies found in porn that their partners may not want or be able to fulfil.
This may affect intimacy and trust with your partner and cause insecurities in one or both members of the relationship.
2. Your thoughts and emotions
If you’re struggling with sex addiction, you may find that your thoughts and emotions are also severely affected.
You may be unable to ‘turn off’ sexual thoughts. You may find yourself unable to stop objectifying your partner or strangers.
You may also feel more emotionally and mentally detached from other people as a result of porn use.
Porn addiction is also more likely to coexist alongside anxiety and depressive symptoms. It has been connected with lower self-esteem and lower life satisfaction.
3. Your ability to live your life
Like other addictions, porn addiction affects the brain.
Through constant use of porn, users may become dependent on the chemical surges associated with watching sexual activity. Over time, you require more frequent use and more extreme porn to achieve the same effects.
Porn addiction may interfere with your ability to fulfil your day-to-day responsibilities. Compulsively watching porn may get in the way of doing household chores, maintaining relationships, or going to work.
If you struggle to control your compulsions, you may begin watching porn in risky places, like at the office or on the street. This could lead to serious personal, vocational, and even legal consequences.
Some people who struggle with porn addiction also spend large amounts of money on porn. This may be at the expense of other necessities and put them, or their family, at financial risk.
How can I recover from porn addiction?
If you’ve tried to stop or lower your porn usage and failed, it may feel hopeless to recover from porn addiction.
There are treatments for porn addiction, and you can recover.
Remember that as with any addiction, recovery is a process. There may be withdrawal, and relapses are very common. Throughout your journey, be patient and kind with yourself.
Therapy for porn addiction
Psychotherapy is a really useful and confidential way to explore and treat porn addiction. Therapy can help you:
- Unroot some of the underlying causes that may be fuelling your porn addiction
- Help you replace maladaptive behaviours with prosocial, healthy ones
- Improve your relationship with masturbation, sexual imagery, and sex
- Help you overcome the compulsion to watch porn
- Understand your relationship with porn
- Build your self-esteem
It is not uncommon for porn addiction to exist alongside other mental health issues. Therapy can help you name, treat, and overcome these issues. Talking to an expert can also help relieve feelings of isolation.
Support groups for porn addiction
Porn addiction can make you feel guilty, ashamed, and alone. Knowing that other people are struggling with the same thing can help alleviate those feelings.
Talking to other people working through their porn addiction helps those struggling stay hopeful that they can replace their negative patterns with positive ones.
These groups help those looking to recover from porn addiction:
- Learn what triggers the use of porn and/or compulsive masturbation
- Introduce corrective habits into your life
- Reduce feelings of isolation and shame
- Help you manage relapses
Strategies to overcome porn addiction
Admitting that you have a problem with porn is never easy. It’s even harder to talk to someone else about it. The effects being open and honest can have on your life, however, can be freeing.
If you’re ready to address your porn addiction try some of these strategies:
1. Find Support Online
Finding support and resources online can be a huge source of help.
Reboot Nation is a community of people recovering from porn addiction and porn-induced sexual dysfunction.
They provide a forum for people to openly talk through their porn addiction and their journey towards recovery. Members provide support, resources, and tips to overcome porn addiction.
Your Brain on Porn is an online database of:
- Resources on how to quit or reduce porn use
- Research on porn’s effects on the brain
- Access to online support forums
It can help you understand porn addiction, and find a path towards recovery.
2. Find a support group
First Step Men’s Therapy offers an 8-week virtual men’s support group for $70 per session. A registered therapist leads the group and helps men in Ontario struggling with porn addiction develop resilience and coping tools.
GTA Sex Addicts Anonymous is a free support group that offers in-person and virtual meetings.
While sex addiction may sound different than porn addiction, they are closely intertwined. Sex Addicts Anonymous group meetings help address issues around porn and compulsive masturbation.
3. See a therapist
A therapist that works with porn addiction can help you turn your life around.
A therapist will give you the space to talk through your issues and form a treatment plan to reduce or halt porn usage.
Your next steps in overcoming porn addiction
Having an understanding of what porn addiction is, how it can affect you, and what you can do about it can empower you to overcome it.
While it can feel shameful to discuss these sensitive issues with someone else, opening up about it in a safe environment is the first step to recovery.
Our experienced team of therapists is here to provide you the support you need to get back the control you deserve.
Register with us to learn more about our porn addiction therapists, or book a session to get started right away.
If you’re not yet ready to connect with a therapist, read these resources for more information:
- If compulsive use of porn is interfering with your relationship, read: Will Couples Counselling Help My Relationship?
- To learn more about psychotherapy, read: What is Psychotherapy? (Pros and Cons)
- To explore ways to find a therapist, read: How to Find a Therapist in Toronto