How to Find a Couples Therapist in Toronto
Deciding to embark on a couples counselling journey is hard enough, but finding the right couples therapist can feel even harder.
Living in a big city like Toronto, there are thousands of therapists to choose from. Neighbourhoods like King West and Yonge and Eglinton have plenty of great therapists ready to help your relationship. So how do you find the best couples counsellor for you?
Working with KMA Therapy since 2008, I’ve not only counselled couples myself, but I've also matched many couples with the best therapist to help them.
This step-by-step guide will give you everything you need to know about finding a couples therapist in Toronto so you can get started working on what’s important to you right away.
To help answer this question, this article will cover:
- Qualities that the right couples therapist for you will have
- Where exactly to go to find the therapist for you
- Which type of couples therapy do you need
By the end of this article, you’ll feel confident in your ability to find the best therapist for you and your partner.
5 Qualities of a Great Couples Therapist
A couples therapist may seem great on paper, but even the most talented therapist won't be able to help you if they're the wrong fit for you.
Look for these five qualities to make sure you're choosing the right couples therapist for your needs.
1. They're experienced in the issues you’re dealing with
Whether it’s infidelity, sex, or communication issues, the right couples therapist for you will have experience in your area of concern.
Ideally, they have worked with many other couples in your scenario and can ensure you make the progress you need.
Don't be afraid to ask about how many couples they've worked with and what experience they have supporting couples facing the same issues as you are.
Some topics commonly covered in couples therapy include:
- Individual issues that impact the relationship (including mental health challenges)
- Division of household responsibilities
- A lack of quality time spent together
- Money and financial stress
- Communication issues
2. They're able to gain both partners’ trust and confidence
The right couples therapist for you will be able to communicate WHY they are the right fit for you and earn the trust and respect of both partners.
You may prefer to ask the therapist many questions about their credentials, experience, and education, while your partner may be more concerned about whether the therapist is the right personality fit.
All of these concerns completely valid, and the right therapist will be able to make you BOTH feel comfortable with their answers.
3. They provide neutral feedback to both of you
A great couples therapist will never take sides, but will rather form alliances with both of you individually and use your unique communications styles to work together to solve problems.
In couples therapy, the right therapist will never approach issues as you vs. your partner. Instead, they'll create an environment where it's you and your partner vs. the challenge you're facing.
4. Both you and your partner like them
In addition to believing your therapist has the skillset to help you, it’s really important that, right from the get-go, you and your partner BOTH enjoy speaking to them.
Couples therapy is an environment where both partners need to receive feedback, work through problems, and be vulnerable.
This is a lot easier to do when you're speaking to a therapist who is easy to talk to and makes you feel comfortable when opening up.
5. They are the right choice for your location and your budget
Seeing a therapist who is outside of your budget is a waste of your money, and seeing a therapist who is too far away is a waste of you time.
The right therapist for you will be within your budget - if you're paying out-of-pocket, make sure you'll be able to afford enough sessions to see meaningful progress. If you're paying through insurance, make sure to choose a therapist who is covered by your provider.
One of the benefits of living in Toronto is that there are so many therapists to choose from - looking up therapists in your neighbourhood is a great place to start.
If you find someone great who is a little further than you'd like to travel, consider online couples therapy! Read Online Couples Therapy in Toronto: The Ultimate Guide to learn more.
What Type of Couples Therapist to See for Common Couples Counselling Issues
Couples counsellors have a wide range of experience and can help with a variety of issues, but some therapists are more experienced in one area than another.
Explore these common couples counselling issues to learn more about what type of therapist to see.
1. Infidelity
Toronto has many great therapists who work with infidelity - whether it was by one partner, both partners, emotional or physical, recent or long in the past.
The truth is that MOST couples counsellors have experience with infidelity as it’s one of the most common reasons couples seek therapy.
The type of couples therapist you’ll likely want to search if you’re dealing with infidelity is:
- A psychotherapist who specializes in couples and/or infidelity issues
- A social worker who specializes in couples and/or infidelity issues
- A counsellor in who specializes in couples and/or infidelity issues
2. Communication issues
Most couples counsellors are well versed in the area of communication. If you’re experiencing difficulty communicating, you may have a partner who uses the silent treatment, has a different attachment style (such as anxious/avoidant), or uses a different love language.
If you need support in creating and enforcing boundaries or renegotiating aspects of your relationship, one of the following therapists are likely the right choice for you:
- A psychotherapist who specializes in couples and/or communication issues
- A social worker who specializes in couples and/or communication issues
- A counsellor in who specializes in couples and/or communication issues
3. Sex and intimacy issues
There are number of reasons your sex life might benefit from the help of a therapist.
These include lack of sexual interest in a long-term relationship, a desire to explore BDSM or kink in your relationship, polyamorous or open relationships, sexual dysfunction such as erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation, or even just wanting to bring your partner greater pleasure.
The best type of therapist for you in this case is a sex therapist in a group or private practice. Read How to Find a Sex Therapist in Toronto to learn more.
4. One or both partners is experiencing mental health challenges
Mental health issues are hard enough to deal with alone, and it's easy for them to begin to affect your relationship.
In addition to working with a therapist individually, couples therapy is a great way to work on how to support your relationship while getting the individual help you deserve.
We recommend you find a:
- A psychologist who specializes in mental health issues (if you're interested in getting an official diagnosis)
- A psychotherapist who specializes in mental health issues who does work with couples
- A social worker who specializes in mental health who also does work with couples
5. Fertility issues
If you’re going through IVF or having issues with fertility, it is very important to have a couples therapist who understands all aspects of this process, as it’s very specific.
The right therapist for you will have seen lots of other couples going through the same thing and will be able to provide a wealth of support:
- Psychotherapist with experience in fertility issues who also works with couples
- Counsellor with experience in fertility issues who also works with couples
6. Family issues
Issues with extended family, in-laws, elderly parents, and even your own children can absolutely have an impact on your relationship.
In this case, it can be helpful to see a:
- Psychotherapist who is trained in couples and family therapy
- Social Worker who is trained in couples and family therapy
7. Pre-marital counselling or a recent marriage
Getting married brings up many challenges and change for couples - not just before the wedding but in the first 1-2 years after your marriage.
Getting pre-marital counselling is an excellent tool to help provide a foundation for your life ahead.
Try to find:
- A psychotherapist who specializes in couples and/or premarital counselling
- A social worker who specializes in couples and/or premarital counselling
- A counsellor in who specializes in couples and/or premarital counselling
Finding a Couples Therapist in Toronto
Now that you know what to consider in your search, follow these five steps to find great couples counsellors near you.
1. Look for a couples counsellor in your Toronto neighbourhood
Whether you live in Yorkville or Liberty Village, searching the type of couples therapist you need within your Toronto neighbourhood can help filter results.
Consider a location that is convenient for both of you - whether that is between both of your workplaces, near to your home, or even online.
2. Search directories like Psychology Today
Online directories have thousands of couples therapists in Toronto to choose from. Data bases like Psychology Today can filter through many different criteria.
Therapist filters you can choose from include:
- Age
- Cost
- Gender
- Insurance
- Type of therapy
- Online or in-person
3. Find a therapy clinic you love and do an introductory session or free consultation
During your search for a Toronto couples therapist, you'll likely find blog posts, videos, and other resources from local therapy clinics. If you find a clinic that really resonates with you, it can be helpful to see which therapist they think will be the best match for you.
Most larger practices (10+ practitioners) have a good range of couples therapists to choose from and offer either paid introductory sessions or free consultations to help you find your best match.
During an introductory session or a free consultation, you’ll be placed with the right fit for you based on credentials, experience, personality, and issues.
4. Ask your family doctor for a therapist referral
Your doctor may be connected to some great relationship therapists in the city.
This is a great option if you’re seeking someone experienced, vetted, and/or that your doctor knows personally.
5. Read reviews of Toronto couples therapists
Don't be afraid to get a second opinion! Explore a therapist's reviews from other clients they've worked with to get a better sense of their work.
Read our article on The Top 5 Couples Counsellors in Toronto for a great list of therapists to start your search.
Next Steps for Couples Therapy in Toronto
After reading this article, you know what to consider when choosing a couples therapist and how to find a great couples therapist near you.
Here at KMA Therapy, our team has a wide range of couples therapists with many areas of expertise, credentials, and personalities to choose from.
You’ll start with a 50-minute introductory session with a specialized introductory therapist to find the best possible match within our practice.
We offer couples therapy at five convenient Toronto locations:
- Yorkville
- King West
- Liberty Village
- Yonge and Eglinton
- Yonge and Sheppard
Register online or download our free Therapy 101 Guide to start your therapy journey with us here at KMA.
Whether you work with us, or another therapy group, we encourage you not to give up in the search for the perfect therapist for you.
If you’re not yet ready to speak to a therapist, read these resources for more information:
- Will Psychotherapy Help Me?
- Will Couples Counselling Help My Relationship?
- How Does Your Attachment Style Affect Your Relationships?
About the Author
Kimberly is the founder of KMA Therapy and one of Canada's most experienced media relationship experts. She received her doctoral degree in Counselling Psychology in 2015 at Middlesex University, where her doctoral research studied the emotional psychology of entrepreneurs. She also has a Masters Degree in Music Therapy from Wilfrid Laurier University and a Bachelor of Arts Degree from the University of Guelph.
